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How I Started To Overcome Social Anxiety As An Entrepreneur

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Hosted by
Simon Lovell

Featured on Forbes.com and Entrepreneur, Simon Lovell coaches and mentors top CEOS, entrepreneurs, and leaders on emotional intelligence, fulfillment, and happiness so they can reach the next level of impact. He is author of The Black Ball: Does Anybody Else Have A Secret & the host of Unshakeable Leaders Podcast.

His loving but NO BS approach and super strong accountability in his signature 6-week program The Super High-Performance Formula has been called 'profound' and 'life-changing'.

I used to be so afraid to let other people know who I really was because I feared being judged and I didn’t want to receive negativity – I hid, shut my mouth, and I felt suppressed. I would spend a lot of time feeling anxious – I felt very unaligned internally and I knew I had issues I needed to tackle.

I had the self-awareness to notice I wanted to connect with people more, as an entrepreneur and socially, but the stories I was telling myself and my excuses were holding me back.

I knew I was creating a lot of stories in my head around why people didn’t like me. I had a real challenge with even looking people in the eye. Why? Because I didn’t want to see myself. I didn’t like what I saw in myself, and maybe I thought that they would think something about me, and it was the perfect way for me to hide.

I wanted to share my truth of who I am. It’s so important that you are true to who you are. 

Stop Hiding Behind Your Screen

A lot of entrepreneurs spend a lot of time behind their computer. You’re working hard, making money, and growing your business, but if you’re spending a lot of time behind your computer because it’s a way for you to remove yourself from the world you’re living in you’re going feel unfulfilled. 

Over time you disconnect from your life more and you allow your business to become your addiction. You get wired in you really lose yourself. You lose your identity because you’re wrapped up in work. 

You want to get your message out to the rest of the world, and that’s important. 

It’s amazing to put energy into growing your business. You’re an entrepreneur and you need to work hard to grow and scale, but it’s important to become self-aware around the things that can be holding you back from living a fulfilling life. 

It’s easy to hide behind your screen to avoid whatever else is happening in your life but everyone needs connection. Humans thrive on it.

I Removed My Excuses

I had a desire to want to be around people and have great conversations, but there was something inside me that would sabotage that. 

I noticed I had two excuses – I was busy or tired: They were perfect statements to stop me from connecting with people even when I got invitations to go to really amazing events that deep down I really wanted to attend.

Once you have self-awareness you can choose to do take action to change your situation.

I decided to call myself out on my destructive patterns. I spoke to my roommate and asked her to challenge me and call me out on my excuses. 

A good mentor, coach, or friend will want to challenge you because they know you can be better and evolve. When you give someone permission to do that, you’re helping yourself to grow. 

I was called out on my excuses; many times! I started to attend business and social events and I began to connect more entrepreneurs. When you start to connect and build genuine relationships, friendships, and connections you start to connect with amazing people – that’s when incredible things happen. As well as having real conversations I was building friendships and taking my business to another level.

Your business naturally starts to scale, and your business starts to grow. 

It’s Time To Show Up

When I host or attend events, my intention is to connect; conversations unfold that lead to other opportunities I would never think possible. When I stopped making excuses I started meeting other entrepreneurs and new groups of people – you never know what may come from that. 

Don’t be afraid to create your own event – an event I created in San Diego called Spiritual Hustle came from a desire I had to build a like-minded community. I wanted to bring together spiritual entrepreneurs and people in business because that forum didn’t already exist.  

I know entrepreneurs can really struggle. 

When you’re at an event, be yourself, don’t stay hidden, and don’t be afraid of who you are. It can be hard it can be to share what’s really going on because, in the entrepreneurial world, it’s one thing to market your message, but it’s another thing to talk about who you really are behind the scenes. 

People love people who want to connect and who are really open. When you speak your truth and you stand up and say, “This is who I am. This is what I stand for,” you attract your tribe. You attract other people who have the same values system as you.

Share yourself, the truth of who you really are and where you are in your journey. There’s a lot of freedom in letting go of fear, to stop hiding, and not feel embarrassed about where you stand. You’ll find that other people who feel the same will gravitate towards you. 

Can You Look Me In The Eye?

The relationships you have are important – the people you connect with, the eye contact you make, and deep discussions you have that go beyond, “Hey, what do you do?” 

Your best opportunities and deep connections that fulfill you and hit your heart at a very deep level happen away from your computer screen. They come from a moment when there’s a vulnerability or authenticity that can only be felt from a discussion in person, face-to-face, or in a small group, sat down, talking about real things that really matter.

It creates a very different type of energy when you are able to do what you want to do in the world, from a place of pure, authentic power.

I and still a bit of an introvert, but I love to get out, meet new people, and generate deep connections by getting together and talking about things that matter to me.

I created the Super High Performance Formula because I understand the struggles entrepreneurs go through and I want you to be happier. It has helped many business owners with their anxiety. Now it’s your turn to have the same breakthrough!

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